If only i have a good memory... The stuff I want to say it out will be right here and be a long one...
The words from my mouth now is just two plain words... I dunno... I really dunno... Why is this happening to me...
I get to know something from Sien Hui.... People still talk behind my back... I even heard from him so ridiculous stuff... But what I can do? Nothing....
People do not listen to me... I am so call a servant... They need me, they treat me nicely.. When they don, all the criticism and insults will arise again..
I really fear of losing friends... Each of them leave and the cut inside me will never heal...
If there is a gathering, and some people dislike me.. I will be ask not to go for the outing... When someone do not wish to talk to someone.. It would be me again...
Something I tried hard thinking what I have done... Maybe I can change? But I can't think of any... The one I can think of is only Angelica's...
Things always happen for a reason.... But I just cant search for the reason anywhere in my head... Kah Yee told me maybe it is time to think what you have done? I think about that...
Things I have done..What are they? I am escaping from something... I know it but I dunno what...
Sometimes I feel hanging out with a Malay group, I feel a lot happier than in a Chinese group.... I dunno why but I just do.... But hanging out in a group, I will always feel left out...
I do not share a common thing with anyone... Even if I do, the person wouldn't discuss about it with me... I can't find someone to talk to.... My chances of talking with someone about something I really like is like the chances that Singapore is getting to have snow in the city...
Mdm Sung have a talk with us on Thursday... She mention what motivates you in doing something.... The answer in my head is support from a single person... But I can't find a single person who will support me all the way...
Mdm Sung wants to know more about us... Sooner or later she will find out about my blog as I think that one of the way she wants to understand the life we are having... my blog is just very dead...No one will read or visit it knowing the fact that nothing good comes from me...
Mr Cheng have a 1 hour talk with me... He said he worry me the most out of all guys in my class... Is that true? He said me finding girls and stuff and said making friends with Sec 1...
I find that topic very disturbing but I cannot say anything as he only take who I am by appearance.. I have been wearing a mask... How will he know the real me?
There is people around me said that they care for me... I fear that.. Because each time I afraid I might take the care for granted and in the end they leave me... I find myself hard to explain this part more so I leave it as it is.....
Flirt... Flirter.. People said that to me.... All I do is flirt...
They are really weird... I once ask a few girls A am I flirting then..The ans is no... I did the same thing to a a few girls B den behind my back this girls A say I flirt with girls B... I am confused...Does everyone take by appearance?
Cant they just try to understand what is going on? Sometimes I know all I do is giving excuses.... But what can I really do... I know out of words to say...
All I know is no matter how hard I try to gain trust or friends or a companion or a support... I will never succeed.....